Blessings, Progress, and an "Off Day" (Day 16)

Today seems to be one of those days.. Ever have those?

They start out amazing and then slowly go downhill from there.

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Last night, I went to dinner with some long-time family friends who live in Moorhead. I hadn't seen them in a LONG time and it was so great to catch up and visit! But more importantly (to me) I was able to sit in a real HOME and eat as a "family".. and what a wonderful meal it was!!! Their 17 year old son, (I remember him as a 7 year old!!) reminded me so much of my brother Isaac.. it felt just like coming home! It was such a blessing to be part of a "family" for a night, and great to catch up with friends!! I am so thankful!

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As for Rebekah, last night she took 2 out of her 3 night feedings by bottle (not all of it orally sometimes, but at least she did take some!!! WooHoo! Progress!) and I was sooooo excited about that! (I was on a super-high all morning) Her weight gain is amazing also, she is currently at 5 lbs 14 oz!!! (4 oz gain in 2 days!) Plus her bilirubin count had been a little light the last few days, but today it was only 7.2! (very low) With all this amazing news, it sure was easy to be upbeat and positive!

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Then, I tried to feed her at 11:00, and she was soooooo sleepy. Just not waking up for me, even with some oral stim the OT (Occupational Therapist) was helping me with. She only took 5 mls in 20 min. :( Kind of sad, but I was positive still, remembering sometimes babies just have "off days" and today (or at least this feeding) might be one of those moments. I just had to decide to take it in stride, and not get too depressed about it. It happens! (If I tell myself this enough times, maybe it will sink in more and more.. cause I find myself getting sad sometimes) :)

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However, even though today is an off day, and I have a rather suffocating nurse (lol) I find myself feeling very at home here in the NICU. I walk into the building, and instead of calling in (from the outside phone) the gals inside recognize me and just open the doors automatically. I am greeted by a hospital volunteer as I wash up, who asks how Bekah is doing! I go to our cubicle and hold her for a while, and am greeted again by some of her latest nurses, who even though they are assigned to other babies today, ask how she is doing today, and take time to visit with me! It's so great to feel part of this little family, and although I can't explain it totally, it's a lot like coming home! I know this is a total God-thing as this week I have really been struggling with homesickness. What a blessing to have such caring staff here!!! I truly am thankful every day for them.. even for suffocating nurses, who just don't know when to leave you alone!! :) lol

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Thanks for the love and prayers this week.. I can't believe tomorrow is already Friday and I will be able to see my Josh!!! I'm very excited and positive even though today isn't quite going according to plan.. or is it "my plan"? God's plans always seems to be much better than mine, so I will just trust that his ways are best!!!