Day 14...Slow Progress and Homesickness

Today Bekah and I are both doing well, she is continuing to take her feedings extraordinarily well, and we hope she will continue to progress by bottle more and more, in hopes of going home soon!! Her weight gain continues to be slow but sure, and it's so great to see!

I will blog more as I have updates worth mentioning! :)

Thanks again for all the fun cards we have been recieving!!! I put every one of them on our little wall, which is rapidly filling up!!! It's such a great encouragement to know you are all thinking of us! We love you and miss you all!

Well, Rebekah is 2 weeks old today, and the homesickness is settling in rather hard. ('Specially sine Leah's 2nd birthday is tomorrow) It's tough being so far away from family and friends, missing everything homey and familiar, and I've been struggling with patience for Bekah's feeds to pick up, so we can come home!

It's nice here, and the people in the NICU and the RM house are all great and wonderfully friendly.. it's just not home. It's hard sometimes to stay positive, but then, just when I am feeling down, Rebekah always has a smile waiting for me! I love her so much!

I've been trying to keep busy, but being here at the hospital from 10:00am- 7:00pm is a long stretch sometimes. I've been working on her photo album, (smart I know!!) writing letters to friends and family, journaling Bekah's progress in her birth journal, plus I'm now planning a bridal shower for my best friend Audrey! (to be held when I get back) It's been fun, and nice to keep busy, keeps my mind occupied. Plus, pumping every 3 hours, and working on feeding Bekah every 3 hours, keeps my days pretty packed. It seems like 7:00 comes pretty fast, which is nice! Then, I go "home" to the RM House, eat dinner and unwind.

Hope your week is going well, love you all!

New Pictures!

Here are some new pics of Bekah, taken by my mom on Saturday!

Bekah's Crib!

Sleeping Peacefully

Bekah in Grandma's arms

Mommy and Rebekah- 11 days old

Then, while Bekah and I are in Fargo, Leah is at home with Grandma, Grandpa, Daddy and Uncle Isaac, having the best time!! Here are some cute Leah pics I had to post!!!

Leah and Teddy.. so cute!

Reading her "Tractor" magazine on the way to church, Easter Sunday!

So funny!!!!!

Our Easter Princess, Leah Rose!

Weekend and Day 13 Update

What a fun weekend we had!!! It went by so fast, yet it was great to get to see Josh and Leah! The RM House was empty all weekend, which meant Leah had total control of the playroom when she came on Friday night, and I LOVED playing with her and hearing her chatter up a storm! (All kinds of new words she's learned while I've been gone!) Then we watched a late movie in our room, and eventually went to sleep! :)

We got to go out to lunch the next day with Josh's Uncle Dan and Aunt Tammy, which was so fun!!! Meanwhile, Grandma Tracy came for a visit with Bekah.. even getting to hold her and help with her feedings!! It was so great she got to spend time with her. Then, I took Leah all around the hospital, while Josh got to spend time with Bekah. We got a slushie, and saw the big player piano in the lobby, and looked at the fun stuffed animals in the gift shoppe! (Kids 3 and under aren't allowed in the NICU) It was fun! Grandma and Leah headed home after that, for a much-needed Leah-nap in the car! :) It was so fun to see her though!

Josh and I had a much quieter Sunday (Easter) with Bekah. We were both"fighting" over who got to hold her first, whenever we'd go visit!!! Haha. Josh LOVES getting to hold her, and just marvels at her tiny hands and feet. It's so sweet to see Daddy and Daughter bond! Yet, Sunday night came by too fast, and he had to head home. (sad!) But the weekend will come fast..

Rebekah is doing very well today! She took her 8am feeding ALL by bottle (This seems to be her "magic hour") and then I tried to feed her again at 11:00, even though we usually wait to every other feeding, and she took 35 mls for me!!! (Almost all of it!) I was soooo impressed! At this rate she will be coming home very soon! :) Her calorie intake has finally paid off also, her weight this morning was 5 lbs 10.9oz!!! Wow!!! That is great! All her doctors are very impressed with her progress, saying they can't believe she is only a 34 weeker! Plus, her awake times are increasing, and I LOVE holding her, watching her look around.

All in all, it is a bright, cheerful, hopeful day for me in Fargo!!! And how I needed one of those! Thanks for all your love! (and all the great cards I have recieved! They truly make my heart smile!!! Plus they brighten up Bekah's room!) Thanks again!

Looking forward to the weekend!!!

I am so excited! Tonight I get to see my Joshy and Leah!!!

They are coming for a visit, Josh for the weekend, and Leah for Fri night-Sat aft. (Grandma Tracy will be coming to see Bekah, then taking Leah back home) So fun!!!

I am just thrilled to get to spend some quality time with Leah, and Josh too!!! It seems like forever until they get here.. :)

But Rebekah keeps making excellent progress, though not as much now, as she is all caught up to where she needs to be! This morning her nurse got her to take her entire 45 ml feeding by bottle!!! WOW! I was so amazed!! I get to try and learn the tricks she did to help Bekah along at her 2pm feeding. (We tube feed one feeding in between, as not to tire her out too much)

Her temps continue to be right on track, though a bit on the low side, but not too much. :)

She did loose a layer of clothes too, (her blanket) so that's progress! Eventually she'll be comfy warm in just her onesie and sleeper, but not yet.

I probably won't be blogging as Josh and Leah will be here, but I will try and update as soon as I can! Thank God for a great day for Bekah and a fun weekend ahead of us!

Day 9

Last night as I left Bekah at 7pm to walk the 4 blocks back to the RM House, her temps were slowly falling, and it was evident she wasn't going to make it in her crib for much longer. I was really bummed, but continued praying all night for her!

Imagine my surprise when I walked into her room and there she was, in her little crib!!! During the night, her temps went up!!! She maintained around 98.2 all night, and through this morning. I think she might be through the hardest part, but it's still not quite "accurate" to say! :) I am soooo excited for her, though! :) It's also so great to just hold her whenever I want! :) Yes, I am soooo spoiled!! :) :)

I have yet to see her Dr. this morning, to be updated in more detail, but during my lunch hour down here, her PICC line will be removed! They stopped the TPN drip yesterday, as you recall, and I guess won't be needing it anymore!! Praise God, for now the only thing inside her little body is her feeding tube!!!! (Her other monitors are external) What a huge blessing!!! I still can't believe it!!! Wow!

Also, she took 20 mls in her bottle feeding late last night, and I got to try at 11:00 and she took about 23 mls for me!!! Her feedings have definately improved by bottle, which is wonderful!!!!

It's just so exciting to see all the progress she keeps making!!! I know it's all due to prayers! Now I just pray she can keep her strength up and not backtrack any.. :) But the way it's looking she will continue onward and upward!

Day 7/8 Update

Today is a busy day for Bekah!!

Dr Kumar upped her feedings again to 45 mls, which is wonderful! (1 1/2 oz) This is almost (or is) a full feeding for her, and she has been digesting it all with no residuals, Praise God! So much so in fact, her nurse today, Michelle, switched her to Size 1 Diapers! Quite a jump from little Premie-Smalls she was in. She is just filling her pants too much.. so wonderful! Never thought you'd be happy to have a baby poop, did you? :) Her TPN (Vitamin Drip) is also being stopped after today, being her feedings are going so well! Wow!!!

Yesterday, we started the "Wean Off Procedure" from her Isolette, which is basically slowly dropping the temperature/humidity inside her isolette closer to room air temp, getting ready for her to move into her crib. She also got to wear little clothes for the first time!! Started with a pink "Princess" onesie, tiny pink socks, and a yellow giraffe sleeper. :) So fun!
When I got here at 10:00 this morning, she was on her final phase of the wean-off, and as I held her for her 11:00 feeding by tube, Michelle put the isolette away in a corner, and brought out her crib!!! We swaddled her in a Halo Sleeper and placed her in her crib. Her temps have been great through the entire procedure, and she seems to be tolerating it very well.
However, it is a LOT more work for her little body to keep her temps and breathing up by herself, and many babies fail their first attempt, which is OK. She will get stronger as she gets older. Plus, she is only 33 weeks, but seems to be doing well. I am just trying to not be too disappointed if she has to go back in.. but what a big step this is for her! Pray that her temps and breathing will be stable all during today.. that is the big thing today!!!

Another positive about her being in her Isolette is that I can hold her anytime now, not just at feeding times. It is important for her to get "rest time" in her bed, but I can still hold her whenever!! I'm really looking forward to that! :) I did hold her for an hour today, and she was awake and gazing at me for most of the time.. it was so fun!!!

Another great positive is yesterday they nurses on duty tried "nippling her" (using a bottle) for feedings. The first time she took 5 mls, 2nd time took 2 mls, and I got to try it at 5pm last night, and it was so great, because she took 13 mls for me!!! It's a bit different than normal bottle feeding, because I have to take the bottle out when she starts to get some milk, to help her swallow what is in her mouth, or she chokes on it. (Usually sucking/swallowing comes by 34 weeks) But she is doing amazing! It's just a slow process, and I think sometimes some of the nurses get frustrated that it doesn't go as fast as tube feedings (which are automatic) but, I am convinced practice will make perfect and want to use my time to help her progress at this. :) Plus I just love to get to do it with her! So far we'll be trying a bottle every couple of feedings, as not to tire her out, because the priority right now is keeping her temps/breathing up in her crib.

(By the way, I am still pumping breastmilk, and that is being used in the bottles, not formula, which I am super-glad about.) Breastfeeding seems to tire her out more, and wasn;t really going anywhere. I would like to try as she gets older, but since she is responsive to the bottle now, it seems like a better option to get her off the tube feedings (hopefully) Because as she gets bigger and stronger, she should have no trouble breastfeeding as well as bottle feed. :) I hope!

I continue to recover nicely, and am starting to get a daily routine down, which helps me a lot! The days go by fast, and it's very special for me to be here with her.

Thanks for all your prayers, and keep them coming, especially today!!

Mail Call !!!

I just found out from the nurses that Rebekah and I can recieve cards and letters in the NICU!!!

It would be so fun to have cards/pictures/coloring pages by your kids, anything to put up in her little cubicle. :) I promise they will be loved and adored!! :) (Yes, I am a bit homesick by now!)

Here is the address to write to us:

Merit Care NICU
c/o Rebekah Helweg
801 North Broadway
Fargo, ND 58122

Bekah's Birth-Day Story!

Here is Rebekah Grace's wonderful, crazy-fast, amazing birth-day story!

Monday night, (the 10th) I did not sleep well at all.. I had a weird back pain in my lower back. I thought I must've pulled something when I was cleaning that day, so I took little notice of it, and just tried to sleep. In the morning when I woke up, it was still there, but just as a dull ache. I figured it was just a pulled muscle, and tried to rest it. But then I discovered some bleeding (spotting) and called my doctor, being it was 32 weeks and I wanted to get it checked out. She managed to squeeze me in her VERY busy day around 11:30.

As I drove in, I was sure it was nothing, and had other lists of things to do in town. I left Leah with my mom at the last minute, deciding it would be better to let her nap at home, rather than in the car with me.

I talked with Dr.Human at my apt. and she thought the bleeding was odd, especially since there was no reason she could think of for it. She checked me out, and got very quiet. I asked her what was wrong, and she yanked off her glove and said "Well, my dear, you are dialated at 5 cm!"How on earth????? I thought to myself. Suddenly those back pains made so much sense! They were contractions! But how, and why? and why didn't I feel any other ones anywhere?

She sent me up right away to Labor/Delievery, and I was whisked into a room, given many shots (steroids, one to develop the baby's lungs) and IVs poked in, etc.. I only mananged to call Josh for a few minutes before my cell phone broke out.. what he heard was "Josh... come... hospital!" Poor guy!!!! I'm sure his heart was racing as he crazily drove there!!! But he arrived around 12, no problem, not as scared as I would have been!

Doctor Human came in again and checked me, and I was dialated to 8 cm!!!!!! She said there is no way we are stopping labor on this baby, and hurridly whisked us through the facts.
#1 - This baby is 7 1/2 weeks early, meaning a team from Fargo is coming to help with the baby and take it back to NICU there.
#2 - If I have a C-section (as planned) I can't go with the baby until the next day, due to recovery.
#3 - If I try for a VBAC, not only is the baby MUCH smaller than Leah, but it would greatly increase the chances of her to breathe better on her own later, (having her lungs get smooshed coming through the birth canal) Plus, If i did a VBAC I could leave 4 hours afterwards to go to Fargo.

There was just so much information Josh and I were processing.. I was so scared to try a VBAC after such a horrible experience with Leah, but finally swallowed my fear for the baby's sake and decided to try it. By now the contractions had finally appeared as normal ones I remember ( I hadn't felt anything"normal" before this!) I was breathing through them nicely, and then they got pretty peaky, so I got an intrathecal (sp?) and that really took the edge off, but didn't leave me totally numb like an epidural.

Dr Human started me on Pitocin (just a bit) to get me the last 2 cm dialated) It was now around 2:30 pm) The Fargo team had just arrived by helicopter and were getting set up for helping with the baby at delivery. Plus my mother in law, Susan just arrived from warroad! When Josh called her hours earlier, she took off and left that minute to get here to help drive us to Fargo, never thinking she'd make it for the birth!!

At 3:00, I was fully dialated, still feeling the contractions, but not the pain, and ready to push!The nurses and Dr Human and my MOL were great at coaching me through pushing, and it was soooo easy! It went beautifully, I got to feel her head come out, and then one more push laster and she was born!!! (at 4:00) I was so incredibly happy to have delivered vaginally and how great it felt, too! We heard a lusty loud cry, and there was Baby Rebekah on my lap, screaming her red chubby cheeks out!!! What a beautiful baby she was! Josh got to cut the cord, and then she was whisked away in the Nursery to be stabilized.

I was just wonderful after delivery, even eating dinner an hour afterwards... then going up to Fargo in the car with Josh and Susan. Feeling like in NO way had I given birth to a baby 4 hours previously!!! It was amazing!!! Praise God for a healthy delivery, baby and mom!

Promised Pictures!!!!

Rebekah's name on her Isolette (done by one of her nurses)

Trying to wake Bekah up by stroking her hair

Rebekah's little cubicle.. poster and all!

Grandma Tracy holds Rebekah's hand.. (so precious!!!)

Sisters in the NICU!

Here she is.. Rebekah Grace!

The beautiful Posterboard Anna and Miriam made for Bekah's room!
It has no equal in the NICU ward!!! Everyone loves looking at it!

Big stretch... :)

Under her Bili lights..

Josh visiting Rebekah

Double chin, yes indeed!!!

Bekah's beautiful honey-colored hair.. yes it does have RED in it!!! How fun!

Auntie Anna with Bekah.. her 2nd niece!

Cute face pic.. (She has a bili blanket underneath her making the light)

Daddy holding Bekah's feet.. so tiny!!! (As big as his thumb!)

Three Generations... :)

Day 5/6 Update

Yesterday (Day 5) was so fun as my parents, Isaac and Anna came for a visit with Leah!

I LOVED getting to see her again.. actually I cried when I first held her! (Even tearing up now!) It was so great to have everyone see Bekah and get to touch her little hands.. ;) Everyone took TONS of pictures (Yes, that will be my next post!) and got some really great shots of everything. Plus Bekah got some fun gifts (a cute pink bear for her isolette from Grandma, and a BEAUTIFUL posterboard with all kinds of wonderful messages and pictures on it from Anna!) It was just so great to feel like a family again! I missed everyone so much!

We celebrated by going out to Olive Garden and having a great dinner. Then came the hardest part, saying goodbye! Not only to Leah and my family, but also to Josh, who is going home this week, back to work and to be with Leah! I am very glad he gets to go spend time with her, but I am so sad to be alone.. even though I am with Bekah! (Gol, I just can't stop tearing up even now! pretty emotional mess I am! :) Haha) However, after the initial goodbye, and a good night's sleep I am doing much better! I still miss everyone, but it is easier today getting to spend time with Bekah at the NICU ward here.

Today (Day 6) is a great day for Bekah, yet very busy. As soon as I got here in the Am (10:00) I was told her PICC line needed to be moved, as the Monday Xray showed it was 2 cm too far in. So, I got to watch the "sterile procedure" and it was very interesting, but sad 'cause she didn't like it at first. However for "painful procedures" as the nurse calls them, she recieves Sucrose, which is high sugar substance, and helps with the pain. (Kind of like a reward for a shot at a clinic) Her Bilirubin count continued to drop all last night, and is now at an 8.2, which means she came off the lights this morning!!! It is so nice to get to see her little face again!

Her oxygen is doing good, she is recieving room air now on her nose tube, which basically is just helping her not work so hard at breathing by flowing it in her nose. (She had trouble with that a few days ago, so they decided to help her with her breathing.) But essentially she is breathing on her own, just with a bit of "flow help" to ease her muscles from working too hard.

I have yet to see her doctor and hear more details on how she is doing, but her feedings are WONDERFUL! She was tripled in her dose since Day 3, making her feedings 20 mls now, ( 2/3 oz) and she is not having any residuals left in her tummy, which is amazing! I praise God her feedings seem to be right on track!

I am heading up to 4th floor now to see her, and check on her for her 2:00 apt. (She has little "apt.'s" every 3 hours round the clock.) Thank you all for your support and prayers! They are truly being answered every day! Love you all!

Praise the Lord for Public Computers at Merit Care!

Well everyone, I am finally sooooo excited to have found a computer that will let me work on my blog and update everyone from here!!! The computer at the Ronald McDonald House (where I am currently staying) is having major problems accepting my site and allowing me to add anything! I read this morning here at Merit Care, that they have public computers available for use, and what a blessing they are! High speed DSL and all! Super excited!

Let me update you with Day 4's update I sent out by email 2 days ago, just because it is a great update leading to today's post. :)

_______________________________________________________

Hi Everyone,
Just a quick email to send an update on Rebekah Grace!

In case you haven;t heard, our little daughter was born 7 1/2 weeks premature this past Tuesday, March 11, 2008 ( at 3:57 pm, 5lbs 7 oz, 18 1/2 inches long) and was transferred to Fargo NICU, where Josh and I are now, staying at the Ronald Mc Donald's house next to the hospital. Anyway, I will be updating our blog with all updates I get, hopefully daily! Please use the site and check it out for all information, as I'm not sure I will be sending out many emails like this one. :)
http://www.bemidjihelwegs.blogspot.com

Today is day 4 for Rebekah after Birth-Day, and she is doing much better than yesterday.

This morning (early) she had a PICC line put in instead of her IV, which will eliminate the need to keep poking her small veins for IVs every few days. It's also very nice to see fewer wires attached to her small body! She still is recieving oxygen through a nose tube after having trouble breathing yesterday, but they are decreasing it to 1 Liter instead of 2 as of right now, which is great!

I finally got to meet her Doctor, and he said the priority right now is feedings. She is getting to feed at the breast (so exciting!) but she can't quite get the sucking/swallowing down, and just sucks for 5-10 minutes and falls alseep, not recieving any milk. (She gets her regular feedings through her feeding tube) But any progress is progress! I also just LOVE to get that 1/2 hour to hold her! Today (11:00) at feeding time, she made the most progress, actually sucking strong for a while, before falling asleep. I was so excited!!! The doctor is going to be upping her feedings, ( hopefully doubling her now 5 ml dose) in hopes it will get her system going and starting to work up to bigger feedings. Once that happens, and she can eat a lot more, have poopy diapers more often etc.. he will hopefully take her off oxygen and even move her out of her isolette (little glass conatiner) into a open crib/type area. :) :) I was so excited to hear that! But I don't forsee it happening very soon, but it' s great to know she can do it when she gets feeding better!

Josh and I have been doing well, spending a lot of time with Rebekah, and yet taking time to rest here at the Ronald McDonald house, which has been amazing! I will try and update more as I can on my blog.. hopefully I can figure out how to do that from here on the computer, it is being a bit tricky!

Thank you for all your love and prayers!

Laura, Josh and baby Bekah!

Amazing News!!!!!

It's a Girl!!!!!!

Rebekah Grace Helweg

Born 7 1/2 weeks pre-mature on

March 11, 2008

Weight: 5 lbs, 7 oz

Measuring: 18 1/2 inches and 12 cm head circ.

Born VBAC (Praise God!) and able to breathe on her own immediately after delivery, showing amazing lung strength! Screamed and fussed like any other term baby! Just a beautiful little baby girl! I got to hold her for a few moment after delivery, and what a special moment that was! Then she was prepped to go to Fargo NICU, where Josh and I joined her that night.

(All prepped for the Helicopter ride)

(Leah and Dad with new "baby Bekah")

(Saying Goodbye for a few hours!)

As of today, Rebekah is breathing entirely on her own, NO ventilator!!! She is taking small amounts of breastmilk I am pumping, and is doing so amazingly perfect it's hard to believe she is only 4 days old!!! She has a bit of jaundice (very normal) and is recieving phototherapy for that. Otherwise her progress is remarkable! I am daily astonished at how strong she is, and continues to be!

I will be using this blog as my update page for Rebekah, so PLEASE check constantly for updates, as she is doing so well, there are many to give! :)

Thank you for all your prayers and love! We can feel them coming from all over and they help keep us going each day! Thank you!

I will also try and get more pictures posted as I figure out how. :)